Stuck in a healing rut? Don’t know what to do next, tried everything, ready to give up?
I feel you!
Healing takes time, can be messy, and is not always linear.
So, how can we keep our eye on the prize and not lose ourselves in the pursuit?
Let’s Start With Our Thinking!
Thoughts have power! What we think creates our reality, informs our behavior and directs our body processes. Science even says so. Our thoughts affect our brain chemistry and the expression of our genes. It’s all connected.
Thought shifting. Notice the difference in these two sentences. “Nothing ever works for me,” versus, “While this treatment didn’t work, it’s possible something else will.” You don’t have to do a 360 and force unbelievable statements. Choose what I call, ‘Next Best Thought.’ A better feeling thought that moves you towards what you want.
Thought testing. What evidence do you have that supports your thinking? We often tell stories (about ourselves or others) that aren’t even true. Ex: ‘Doctors are always dismissive.’ Now, think of a time you were helped by a doctor. Turn it around even further. How have you been dismissive of your doctors, or how do you dismiss yourself? BAM!
You can explore thought testing in greater detail in Byron Katie’s ‘The Work.’
Get Direction & Support
Who can help you navigate, clear through the clutter? Ask one of your doctors to help you prioritize, bring a friend or family member to an appointment, seek out a therapist or online group for assistance and support. So many people are going through similar issues and are happy to help.
Take A Break/Change Focus
Sometimes you just need to turn it off. That could mean a break from Googling or anxiously jumping from treatment to treatment especially if you are not responding. Weed out anything critical you might need to do for your health, and let go of the rest – for now.
What are some healthy distractions or more nourishing ways to spend time?
While I was bedridden for years, living with my brother and his family, I spent time listening to inspiring podcasts, TED Talks, watched inappropriate comedy on Netflix with my nephew, and formed a strong bond with Chico, their cat, who became my BFF. Best. Feline. Friend.- and on site healer.
While it was an incredibly challenging time and I was very debilitated, I stayed engaged. Also, the connections I made with my family will stay with me forever. I would not have otherwise had the opportunity.
Accept Where You Are
Lay down the sword. Accept what you can’t change right now and create some peace for yourself. Honor everything you have done to get well, all you are juggling and trying to accomplish.
Give in…Inward Giving!
Have An Anchor
What grounds you and keeps you connected? It could be prayer, community, animals, nature. Something that provides stability, comfort, a sense of safety, belonging, meaning or perspective.
Stay Open & Patient
Two steps forward, one step back. Different treatments may work at different times as our bodies, mindsets and environments change. Setbacks are not sentences. Give them a seat at the table. Small changes add up, collect them.
Healing is more than positive body markers and a reduction of symptoms. It invites us to truly meet ourselves comprehensively, and with curiosity and compassion.
Finding our way through the maze can be tricky and tiring. Not everyone will get there at the same time, in the same way, but the path is designed to be accessible and welcoming to all.
- What has been the most helpful strategy or practice when you feel stuck?
- What comforts or anchors you?
- Any insights … or additions?